We are honored today to present a guest post by Romina. She is a sometimes teacher, all times mother, living with the loss of her third son. Ellis Tilde Asuro was born still on November 21, 2013.
I gave birth to death.
That is not a metaphor.
I gave birth to death
and I don’t know how to wean him.
They hint at it. It’s time to let him go.
They don’t speak his name.
I’ve been told he’s getting too old for this.
If I don’t do it now, this may go on forever.
I pushed death out of me and he stopped being mine.
I pushed death out of me and I stopped being his.
In the nine months since, I could have made a living child.
And in the nine months since, I could have learned to let him go.
But in a whole lifetime, I could not create enough life to
bring him near. I could not transform him into the living.
Has anyone told you it's time to move on? How do you respond?